


the hurt will fade

by TurntechLoveThis (angelcult)



Series: noncontober [7]
Category: Homestuck
Genre: Anal Fingering, First Time, M/M, Making Out, Non-Consensual Oral Sex
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-09
Updated: 2020-10-09
Packaged: 2021-03-07 21:55:46
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,414
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26914759
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/angelcult/pseuds/TurntechLoveThis
Summary: Dirk plans out their first time in his head, like he does everything, except, it doesn’t go according to plan.
Relationships: Jake English/Dirk Strider
Series: noncontober [7]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1947919
Comments: 3
Kudos: 39





	the hurt will fade

Dirk’s been preparing for this for  _ months.  _ Everything would be perfect, and if it wasn’t, well, he reluctantly wrung his hands together at the thought.

He could always back out, tell Jake that he wasn’t ready, and he’d listen, that’s what he does, Jake  _ listens. _

He listens to Dirk, he comforts him and cares for him, it’s why having sex with him will be so warm and inviting, whether they get through it or not.

—

“Come on, let’s watch a movie.” Jake offers, accent rounding his words in a way that’s just so  _ beautiful  _ and soft, Dirk can only nod in agreement.

It lights up Jake’s face, makes this cute smile come to it, and his button nose scrunches adorably when he does. 

“We can watch..” His voice trails off as he leads Dirk to the couch, bouncing excitedly on his toes in a way that proves to be exceedingly cute, even if they are both grown men who’re basically gods.

“Jake?”

“Mm?” He turns to Dirk from his rambling, and Dirk clears his throat, suddenly uncomfortable with those eyes on him, they’re so green and open and so expecting of a response now that he called him..

“Do you want to cuddle on the couch?” An invitation of physical affection from Dirk was, by all means, a rarity. He did not touch others excessively, not when he didn’t have to, and it even translated to his own relationship.

He simply wasn’t used to touch, it was weird, sometimes  _ gross,  _ but Jake was so warm and his skin was soft, and his hips were very  _ inviting  _ in his shorts. 

Jake smiled wider and nodded, picking a movie at random before he was in Dirk’s arms, hugging him and leading him back to the couch.

They climbed on, Dirk under Jake, a willing show of submissiveness, like a wolf showing its belly. He was willing to be vulnerable in order for Jake to lay between his legs, a top his chest and sink into him. 

They weren’t watching the movie so much as they were enjoying one another’s warmth. 

Dirk could kiss him, he  _ could,  _ and Jake loves touch so much, he’d kiss back, it’d be a wonderful kiss..

“Jake,” Dirk starts softly, drawing his attention from the movie and to himself and he leans down and softly kisses him, and Jake kisses back just as expected.

Jake has stopped surprising him a long time ago, there’s a comfort in that, in the repetitive routine they’ve made, that Dirk can only relax into it.

Jake scoots up his chest, deepening their kiss and wrapping his arms around Dirk’s neck, moaning softly into his mouth when he feels Dirk’s teeth against his lips and his tongue.

They make out happily, Dirk’s hands sliding down to Jake’s hips and squeezing them, making him laugh softly into their kiss. It evolved into slowly grinding against each other, gentle rolls of their hips, getting more fervent and feverish when they started to seek out the friction and the heat more, moaning openly but still quietly.

No longer kissing, their mouths rested together and Dirk was so achingly hard beneath Jake, and Jake was hard against his thigh, they’ve felt the other like this before and they’ve usually stopped. Now, however, they’re gazing at each other in question and Dirk gives a little nod that Jake returns before they’re losing their pants, underwear soon to follow, tangling their legs together and  _ moaning  _ at the bare friction.

More heavy petting, their grinding now quick and dirty, Dirk feeling the way the pleasure curls his spine, loving Jake’s moans, the way he tilts his head back or how he flushes red, the way he looks down at Dirk with this soft, sweet look.

“Jake-“ Dirk moans, eyes closing when he feels Jake’s hand against his lower stomach, sliding down further and then he’s touching Jake too, and it’s really fucking big, it won’t f-

He panics, just a little, just a widening of his eyes and a sharp inhale and then he’s pushing up at Jake’s chest.

“Jake?”

“Yes, love?”

“I don’t-“

“What’s wrong?” His eyebrows furrow and he looks worried and then the panic recedes, because this is why he wasn’t scared in the first place.

He knows Jake will listen.

He searches Jake’s eyes and he allows him to, knows how much comfort it gives, and then he smiles a little in a relieved way and Jake relaxes some too.

Crisis averted.

“Kiss me.” He requests softly, and Jake does, and it’s slow and gentle and achingly romantic. 

Jake’s getting harder in his hand, and Dirk can say the same about himself, they’re each giving fervent thrusts upwards, seeking out friction and release, but there’s a brief moment of understanding passed between looks and soon they’re letting each other go in favor of awkwardly mentioning lube, and wondering:  _ do we need a condom? Can gods get STIs? _

They forgo the condoms but not the lube, and Jake’s fingers are a bit bigger than his own, they reach deeper and Dirk is almost embarrassed by the way he arches his back and grinds down against his hand, listening to Jake as he says such filthy things to him.

_ “My fingers just slid right in, do you do this to yourself?” _

The answer is  _ yes,  _ he does, and he thinks of Jake every time, he moans his name, he flushes red and gasps like he’s being watched, like Jake can see him.

_ “Answer me, Dirk, do you?”  _ The thrusts of his fingers temporarily getting faster and rougher until Dirk’s moaning and stuttering out his answer, a loud “yes, yes, I do, Jake, I do-“

Like he’s getting engaged. 

Two fingers becomes three, and three becomes four because Jake wants to be sure, and Dirk can take it, he _loves_ having Jake touch him like.

Soon, the slicked up head of his cock is pushing at his hole, Jake’s head resting against Dirk’s sternum as he starts to slowly push in and-

_ “Ow.”  _ Dirk whines, tensing up and Jake shushes him softly, but the hurting persists and he actually  _ does  _ want to stop now, he doesn’t want it, he-

“Jake, stop, it-“

“Dirk-“

“It hurts-“

“It’s supposed to.” Jake mumbles, and Dirk’s sort of panicking now, what if he tears, what if there’s blood?

He’s no stranger to his own blood but from such a vulnerable place, caused by his own boyfriend, it scares him.

“Jake, seriously-“ He’s squirming now, trying to fight him off but Jake grabs his wrists and pins them. 

“Stop moving, you’re going to hurt yourself-“

Dirk goes tense and still when Jake mutters a soft  _ “fuck it”  _ and pushes all the way in and there’s so much pain and there’s tears in his eyes, he feels betrayed too,  _ hurt. _

“Jake-“ His voice is a whisper, and he realizes that he’s shaking a little.

“Shh, stay still, let me-“ Slow thrusts, like he’s trying to avoid making Dirk bleed, but soon they’re fast and hard, _ deep,  _ but not as good as his fingers were, in fact, Dirk isn’t seeing much pleasure in this at all, it’s all pain and aching and he’s crying now.

Jake’s moaning, but it’s soft and quiet, and Dirk is wondering when  _ yes  _ became  _ no  _ and why Jake hadn’t listened.

Jake’s thrusts are getting sloppier, and his grip on Dirk’s hips slides down to his thighs where he spreads his legs more, staring down between then where they meet  _ over and over again,  _ until he’s cumming with a high moan and tightly closed eyes.

Dirk closes his own against the warmth flooding him, the sting of his pride and the hurt of his betrayal as Jake slowly pulls out and it’s like nothing happened, Jake’s fretting over him and going “oh, Dirk, you didn’t finish!” and now he’s sliding lower between his legs, touching Dirk and trying to get him hard again.

The stubbornness of his mouth and hands does the trick, now Dirk’s quietly gasping and thrusting shallowly into Jake’s mouth, tears leaking down his cheeks, an aching pain deep inside of him.

He finishes inside of Jake’s mouth, and he swallows  _ everything,  _ and then he’s helping Dirk to his feet, fretting like a mother hen over how he needs to clean him, and how he must be tired, about how he can  _ spend the night  _ if he wants to.

Dirk chances a look down, he’s just happy to see white instead of red. 


End file.
